One year ago:
A mess. Life as I knew it fell apart. I went from having a relationship which was incredible by fucking it up. I fucked my self up… maybe I knew I deserved it.
Wrong choices. Made decisions which I never thought I would make. Hurt people I never would intend to: nobody deserved it, myself excluded. I deserved it. I deserve every scar that I’ve caused to myself.
People. How can they be so cynical. From throwing, punching, kicking, and breaking a woman down… how can they live like that?
Lucky me. A year later, I still am dealing with this stuff. Fast forward to today and I still have to deal with the pain. The mental torture. The thought of seeing that person who mentally broke me.
Regret. I have so much.
How do I even start to move past those feelings? How do I even start to trust myself with feelings to another?