The Ongoing Process: Unspoken

One year ago:

A mess. Life as I knew it fell apart. I went from having a relationship which was incredible by fucking it up. I fucked my self up… maybe I knew I deserved it.

Wrong choices. Made decisions which I never thought I would make. Hurt people I never would intend to: nobody deserved it, myself excluded. I deserved it. I deserve every scar that I’ve caused to myself.

People. How can they be so cynical. From throwing, punching, kicking, and breaking a woman down… how can they live like that?

Lucky me. A year later, I still am dealing with this stuff. Fast forward to today and I still have to deal with the pain. The mental torture. The thought of seeing that person who mentally broke me.

Regret. I have so much.

How do I even start to move past those feelings? How do I even start to trust myself with feelings to another?

Advertisements

Organized Chaos

fullsizerender_2

It is a hope of mine that love and happiness can be shown from the inside out and viewed from the outside in. Although it might not be apparent to most, the ones who truly emanate positive values are the ones to keep close by your side.